12 million see more of my girl than I do ..I watch her on TV & dream

WHEN Amanda Holden holds court in front of 12 million viewers on Britain's Got Talent one man is glued to the screen hanging on her every word... her heartbroken father Frank.
He has met his famous daughter only three times in 30 years and hasn't seen her for three years - so his main "contact" is via the TV screen or in the pages of magazines.
This week former Navy man Frank, 61, broke down as he made a public plea to Amanda, saying: "Can we forget the past and have some kind of future together?"
Frank said: "This is the first time I've spoken out about my relationship with her - I'd like to set the record straight and reach out to her.
"There's always two sides to a story and I would like to finally put my side. It's not the fact she's famous. She is family - and I'm heartbroken over it all.
"I know I was a lousy dad and I can see why Amanda can't forgive me. But I'm genuinely sorry. I get emotional even talking about it. I wish things had turned out differently and there's literally not a day when I don't think about it. I'm so remorseful."
Amanda, 38, a star of hit TV shows like Wild At Heart as well as a in the pages of magazines. to ' judge in Britain's Got Talent, hasn't forgiven Frank after he left the family home for good when she was four and sister Debbie three.
The girls were brought up by mum Judith, 59, and stepdad Les Collister, 63 - the man Amanda calls "Dad". In fact, just before her wedding to Les Dennis, in March 1995, she said: "I don't regard Frank as my dad. He knows I'm getting married and he realises he can't be there. It wasn't a difficult decision because he hasn't been part of my life for many years."
But Frank says now: "Of course I wanted to go to the wedding. I didn't expect NOT to be invited. I didn't even know she was getting married till I read it in a magazine. She's even been quoted saying, 'He's only a sperm donor,' which was even more hurtful."
Nor was Frank invited to her star-studded wedding to music bigwig Chris Hughes in December 2008.
Frank says: "That time it didn't ruffle my feathers too much. People said I should have been gutted, but actually I wasn't because I wasn't expecting an invite. Once again, I just read about her big day."
Frank admits he wasn't there for his daughters while they were growing up, but blames it on circumstances - and the pressure of his career as a naval petty officer.
"I was based at HMS Collingwood in Fareham, Hants, when Judith asked me to leave the home because she was fed up of the absences." steel rings
Frank left, then returned to try to patch up the marriage. But it didn't work and he left for good in 1976.
SHORTLY after the split he was drafted to Plymouth, 150 miles away, and made a decision he now deeply regrets - to break off contact.
He says: "I had two hours access a week on a Sunday, no transport and very little money. So I reluctantly made the decision not to visit, but to keep in touch at Christmas and birthdays. I thought me turning up for just a few hours a week would disrupt their lives - not mine - so I made what I thought was the best decision.
"I'd been drinking too much before I left, and the divorce caused me to have a nervous breakdown. My mental health was in a fragile state and I didn't want to expose the girls to it. I was under psychiatric care and Audemars Piguet Fake I thought it was best to stay away. With hindsight it was the worst decision of my life and I bitterly regret it."
Frank says he paid maintenance of pounds 110 a month to support his daughters until he left the Navy in 1984. And he treasures the few memories he has of his time with his girls before he left.
"Debbie remembers me playing with them in the lounge doing 'horsey-horsey' when you are on your knees and the kids ride on your back," he says. "And I bought them an upright piano which I painted white and gold. They clunked around making a racket.
"I remember taking them for walks in their double buggy. There's no words to describe the feeling of hearing your little girl say 'Daddy'."
But 18 years passed and Frank met new partner Pauline Long before meeting his daughter again in 1994. They were reunited when he left a letter for Amanda at the Theatre Royal, Plymouth, where she was appearing in The Sound Of Music. "Not a day went by without me thinking of the girls but I felt I couldn't just snowball back into their lives when they were growing up," he says.
"I always knew I'd wait till they were adults and let them make their own minds up if they wanted to see me. Amanda appearing in a play nearby seemed like fate was sending me a sign. I just wrote expressing a desire to see her, but thinking that after all that time she probably wouldn't want to."
But Amanda rang - and revealed she and Debbie would like to meet him. Frank says. "I was ecstatic. Amanda was pleasant but to the point. She wanted us to meet at the theatre as soon a possible a few days later. The night before I didn't sleep a wink. I was terrified they'd take an instant dislike to me but it was a chance I had to take."
On the day Frank nearly missed the girls as they stood outside the theatre and he was inside. He says: "I was a bag of nerves, terrified they weren't going to turn up.